Souls Sisters: Can Friends Be Business Partners?
By Dawn and Candace

With the beginning of a New Year comes new plans, enthusiasm, and the blessing of a fresh start (much needed after the economic collapse of 2008). In 2009, many women will step out on faith to create major changes in their lives – quitting an unsatisfying job, getting rid of toxic friendships, or perhaps the most courageous leap of all, starting a new business.

Starting a business in uncertain times will test your determination to succeed. You’ll have to rely on your network of friends, family, and colleagues. You’ll form short- and long-term alliances.

Several years ago, we embarked on our own adventure as business partners. Can friends run a business together? Yes they can. We offer our story because it sheds light on the joys and challenges of partnership. This is our story. Dawn and Candace 

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When two high school friends and former Simon & Schuster employees felt an evolution in themselves Candace Sandy and Dawn Marie Daniels searched the bookstore shelves to find smart, helpful information that mirrored their lives as successful, upwardly mobile, women who still grappled with day-to-day issues. They turned to self-helps books and inspirational titles and felt motivated at first but still noticed that their experience as Black women was fully looked at. Daniels saw that many of the books that she picked up had the same positive formula but lacked real life answers and solutions. “I noticed that a new approach was needed, one that would fit for today's woman (of color) whether she worked in the boardroom or the coatroom,” stated Dawn who launched the literary careers of Iyanla Vanzant two of which landed on the New York Times.

They felt compelled to publish these stories in Souls of My Sisters: Black Women Break Their Silence, Tell Their Stories, and Heal Their Spirits, an edited book of true life experiences of women of color. In Souls of My Sisters, women from all walks of life candidly reveal how they overcame challenges just like those faced by women every day. From Patti Labelle, Terrie Williams, actress and First Lady of Turk & Caicos, LisaRaye and Mary J. Blige to single moms and spiritual leaders, these diverse females have bonded together in print, to discuss issues that have touched their lives.  Eight years and hundreds of thousands of books later, Souls of My Sisters has produced book tours, online resources, book clubs and another book entitled Souls of my Brothers.

“In the true tradition of successful African American pioneers, we decided to stop looking for a solution and build the next generation of inspirational book titles that goes beyond self-help into a new arena of self-empowerment,” states Dawn. “We approached Kensington Publishing Corp. about creating Souls of My Sisters Books, a powerful, smart and dynamic new imprint that reflected women who fit the exact same description.”

Sandy a Congressional Communications Director in New York who has coordinated national political campaigns is a native of Trinidad. With contacts across the board she connected with women all over the country that had stories to tell that were deeper, more personal and had a harder edge than anything Sandy or Daniels had ever seen in print.

Today, Souls of My Sisters Books will continue the successful track of women's empowerment through the publication of at least four innovative new book titles a year. After publishing a revised and updated version of Souls of My Sisters (Feb. 2008), the first book that was launched under imprint is a self-empowerment handbook called Souls Revealed: A Souls of My Sisters Book of Revelations and Tools for Healing Your Life, Soul and Spirit with a foreword from Star Jones using the wisdom of our friends, mothers and sisters and the knowledge of national experts in the field of human behavior, Souls Revealed is the virtual manual for how to make success a routine despite the obstacles that may come.

What is wonderful about this partnership is that two women can pool together their resources and have an opportunity to provide a service or a product to fill a niche and with the right strategy, hard work and determination can become the American dream. A partnership is two wheels on a bicycle if one is flat, out of shape; worn or torn you are going nowhere fast. But if both wheels are in great shape the places you can go as a team is limitless. 

“All of this growth was great and we enjoyed working with each other but did our friendship suffer?” states Candace. “The answer is yes!  It’s simple life - happens and roles change.  A few weeks before we swung open our doors my Uncle that helped raised me and who was a second father suffered a fatal heart attack.  One month later Dawn’s mother was diagnosed with stage 2B ovarian cancer and had an emergency hysterectomy with follow up chemotherapy and radiation.”  

“We were also bogged down with the case of what we call in our book Souls Revealed: A Souls of My Sisters Book of Revelations and Tools for Healing Your Life, Soul and Spirit toxic friends.  “The naysayers just mounted a campaign,” stated Dawn.  “Whether it was our respective boyfriends, children or friends everyone seemed to revolt at the same time. Although I had a keen insight for what I call crazy, Candace was more open to giving everyone second and third chances and it created havoc in our lives and we were both strained from the wear and tear.”

“I have always been a supportive friend as was Dawn but when all of this happened my first inclination was to manage the business so that Dawn could be present for her family.  That was my way of helping the situation but it just alienated us,” said Candace.  “Dawn felt left out and I spent most of my time working not leaving me much energy or time.  I came to realize that the best way to support her was to just be there, have coffee and talk.” 

A lesson learned. Both Dawn and Candace have learned a lot and have gained strength from the partnership. 

Candace said, “this has been one of the best experiences of my life and I am glad that I get to share that with Dawn. I would not have it any other way.”

Lessons Learned:

Lesson 1# What is your collective vision? Share in advance what are you’re deal breakers, must haves, and what you both want out of the partnership. Have this conversation frequently it will save you a lot of time and energy.

Lesson2#: What is your role? Define your business roles. Who will handle what responsibilities and capitalize on your strengths. One of the key issues that partners need to clarify is their execution strategy and it needs to be your key strengths. Great ideas are plentiful but the execution is what determines your success.     

Lessons3#: Ask yourself what are you’re weakness? Do you have low self esteem, are you fragile and not willing to come out of your comfort zone, jealous, envious, paranoid, or believe that women should take the lesser role in life? Opening a business is not for you. These feelings and emotions will be the filter that you see your everyday life and your partnership will fail because of it.  Most of all these feelings of inadequacies will have absolutely nothing to do with the business or your partner.  Seek counseling because this will be a stumbling block that can overcome your goals.  

Lesson 4#:Get rid of toxic people. These are the individuals that are sometimes the closest to you i.e. friends, lovers, family and co-workers. Believe me it will be a painful situation at first but you will be thankful later.  When you set off on your new venture these people will do everything in their power to deter you.  Partially because they are comfortable in a situation and now you have come along with big dreams and ideas and it leaves them feeling left behind.  We know this first hand and each situation which occurred with us seemed more painful than the last.  What we recognized was that successful people surround themselves by other successful people. We found a mastermind group of other business owners who were of like mind and had the same philosophies—we want to help people and build a business along the way.  This group was helpful with brainstorming and feedback on business decisions. 

Lesson #5 Your friend and business partner is not your therapist.  We have a tendency as women to work through our issues with conversations.  It helps to get things off of your chest but if you are stuck in a bad relationship or another stumbling block it is best to seek professional advice.  If you chose to sit in the situation it is not painful to watch but it strains the partnership.

Lesson 6#: Listen Carefully. Most people will not be direct with you even if you plead with them. Listen carefully and read between the lines. People will eventually tell you everything you need to know.  Recap the conversation and acknowledge that you truly heard your partner. 

Lesson 7#: Conflict and friction will arise. Expect it, it is natural—don’t run away from it. Learn to see it coming and provide a resolution in advance.  Avoid bringing up past issues during conflict because it would only exacerbate the situation.   What can we do to avoid this issue? Wait for the moment to pass and revisit it shortly thereafter.

Lesson 8# Start an independent consultancy outside of your partnership.  The gifts that you are putting to work in your current partnership are a valuable asset. Begin an independent consultancy and it will give you a chance to put some of the skill sets that you have gained and work with other businesses. This extension of yourself will give you creative freedom and expand your network base to help build your partnership.

Lesson 9# Attend events outside of your immediate business circles Dawn and I attend literary events but we also attend events from other industries which run the gamut from political to automotive   Other opportunities will exist once you create them.